Why the Star Wars Prequels Sucked

It is a truism that the Star Wars prequels sucked. (Elsewhere, I’ve commented that the franchise being sold to Disney means someone can finally tell the tragic story of Anakin Skywalker’s seduction by the dark side.)

But the issue of exactly why they sucked is complex and layered, and most of us prefer not to consider it too deeply. Fortunately, you no longer have to. You can simply get “Why the Star Wars Prequels Sucked, and Why It Matters,” a short “Polemic on Aesthetics, Ethics and Politics. With Lightsabers.”

Really, what else do you need to know?

An example? Ok, the diner scene, and how it compares to the cantina scene. The cantina exudes otherness and menace. The diner looks like it was filmed in 1950s and then had a few weird things ‘shopped in. The scene undercuts the world which Star Wars established. Or the casual tossing in that Anakin was a virgin birth, and how after tying to one of the most enduring stories in western culture, the subject is then never referred to again.

Or the utter lack of consequence of anything in the stories, since we already know how they’ll come out, and how, by focusing on characters whose fates we know, Lucas drains any dramatic tension of of the story. The list goes on and on, and if you want to know why you hated the prequels so much, this is a short and easy read, and highly worthwhile.

Oh, and you’ll learn how Lando Calrissian is Faust. So go buy it already.

One last thing. Delano Lopez? That’s a name I hadn’t heard in a very long time. But he and I went to school together.

One thought on “Why the Star Wars Prequels Sucked

  1. There have been plenty made about how the prequals sucked (classic fave being a series of reviews by RedLetterMedia). I also look forward to what Disney will do with this franchise, both from new movies but also hopefully releasing the originals on bluray. However, I don’t really need to know more about Anakin. I dislike that the original trilogy was about Luke (and the characters around him), but then the prequals completely switched gears and made the whole series about Anakin/Vader. Boo.

    Well, that and Lucas made a trilogy of children’s movies with the prequals, whereas all of us children grew up and into the original trilogy because it wasn’t made to be a kid’s thing. That allows it to be endearing for life.

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